Chinese woman shares how her mother demanded her & her 2 sisters fork out RM38k for her brother’s dowry

Image credits: Bloomberg and iStock

Behind every beautiful wedding is a long process of preparation and budget planning, where the betrothed have to decide how they want to celebrate their union. However, weddings are known to cost an arm and leg, even if it is just a simple ceremony.

Not to mention the groom must offer a dowry to the bride’s family in some cultures, such as in China, in order to establish goodwill between the in-laws. Most couples would just save up and plan the occasion based on their savings, while some would reach out to their family for help.

As for a lady in China, she was persuaded by her mother to provide an exorbitant amount of money for her brother’s dowry.

Chinese woman asked to pay RM38K for his brother’s dowry

Offering ‘Pin Jin’ or dowry is a Chinese wedding tradition during betrothal ceremonies. Image credits: Bloomberg

A Chinese woman shared on XHS how her mother approached her and asked her for such a large amount of money. She uploaded a screenshot of the conversation she had with her mom, where the latter wished to discuss something with her on the phone. She wrote that the woman’s brother and uncle just went to meet his in-laws, and they demanded a dowry of $180,000RMB (RM113,116).

Image credits: iStock

Instead of advising her son to save up, the mother contacted the XHS user and her two sisters to cough up their money for the dowry.

“You three sisters should offer $60,000RMB (RM38,251) each to your brother. If you can’t even care for your brother at times like this, who is going to? I’m old and incapable now. Also, the people around you would deride you if you refused to care for your brother,” the mother said to the woman on a phone call.

“Am I supposed to be in debt for my whole life?”

After receiving the phone call from her mother, the woman broke down and cried out her frustrations. She wrote that she could not handle this anymore, and refused to care for her brother’s needs and responsibilities.

Furthermore, she revealed that she has been in debt since her graduation as she provided her family with a lot of money to this day.

“I gave them money whenever they needed it, applied credit cards for them and lend them cash to the point where I am now neck-deep in debt. And now they want me to give them a daughter-in-law?” she wrote.

Many netizens were on her side in this predicament and advised her to not provide them with the dowry.

“This is only a dowry. Can you imagine what would happen if he (the brother) has to support child care, education, his wife, his parents and medical care?”

“That’s so unreasonable of her (the mother)! If you can’t afford the dowry then just don’t marry yet. Don’t trouble your family members over your own incompetence. Do not give him even one single penny.”

“Do not give him any money, or he’ll ask for more in the future.”

What do you think? Should she pay up the money?”

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Also read: M’sian parents borrowed RM20,000 from loan sharks to fund son’s wedding reception after he refused to pay it himself

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